Shame Fuck Stride of Pride

When I was in university, it was as an adult student.  I have had the luxury of never looking my age so I spent a few weekends playing with the kids fresh out of high school without them knowing I was almost a decade older than them.  It made going to parties at frat houses rather interesting.

It has been hypothesized that this is where I developed a taste for younger men.  I'll never tell.  In public.  About the hockey player.  Who may or may not have been a Deke.

Every year, without fail, there would always be one of those frat boys in my classes.  You know the guy, hotter than the flames of hell with his own fan club that follows him around. I imagine this is what university was like for Ryan Lochte.  To be honest, part of me wonders how he made it through university.  You cannot deny he is an amazing swimmer but there is something, I don't know, vapid, happening there.

I know you have been thinking the same thing so do not admonish me.

I also know you enjoy looking at him (the dancing bit and the smirk at 0:25 makes me fall out of my chair every damn time):

Yes, you like me, want to hit that shit like the wrath of Gawd.

Then you see something like this and realize that, yeah, you would still hit it but you would be doing the walk of shame afterwards:

"A what?"  Charmed, for sure.  "Romper!"  Great.  #bouncingmyass

There is a link on YouTube of our Ryan being interviewed by a charming lady with the patience of a saint.  Before you all go to Gainsville on your post-Olympic Ryan Stalk 2012, you should know that 7 times 4 in Ryan's world is 21.  Well done University of Florida.  Nailed it.

Fratboy douchetard?  Probably.  Top of the Shame Fuck list?  Absolutely.

I am guessing that would explain all those one night stands his mother speaks so freely about.

Random Sauce, Part Nine

No one can force you to drink a keg of beer for dinner.
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My bangs are not the only thing that is ruining my life.
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He wants me to have hate sex with him.  But I don't hate him.
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She tells me that worse things have happened.  Yes, they have.  But why is this thing happening?
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While it may not be for me to understand and it may just be something I have to do, I would like it to make a bit of sense while I'm doing it.
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Fermer la douche.
~~~~~

I Do Sam, I Do

(Originally posted on my old blog "The Domestication of a Punk Rock Foodie" on May 12, 2010.)

So I have decided that after Sam Worthington comes to Canada and lands on me and falls in love with me, we are getting married and he is taking me to the Poseidon Undersea Resort in Fiji for our honeymoon.

It is all under water. Can you imagine? How many people can say they took a bath underwater? With Sam Worthington? I know.

Now, if you see Sam, tell him I'm waiting. Patiently.

And slightly stalkerishly.

That is what he gets for being on top of my freebie five list.

Also, feel free to remind Sam that I am worth every penny of the 20K per week this place costs.

Who knew it would cost so much to have under water sexy times without drowning?