There was the anxiety a few days before.
There was the epic hair removal session the night before. Smooth from the eyelashes down.
This was going to be our first time doing this sort of thing and a girl needs to be prepared.
He was late. My guts were churning. I sat with my eyes closed, meditating, breathing deeply, hoping this was going to go well.
We have not known each other long and I knew it was going to be awkward.
This was our first time and all I wanted to do was vomit. This did not bode well for me.
He finally arrived. Told me to remove my "bottoms." I also removed my top. That is how I have always done it. He turned around. He was mortified. This was not going well.
It got even more awkward when my cervix went AWOL.
It wasn't all bad. We laughed, we talked about pedicures and Brazilians, he finally found my missing cervix, and when he was done, my boobies did not feel like they had been pushed into my spine through my armpits after they have been taken out into the hall and walked around the clinic.
And that is how my first physical with my new G. P. went.
Remember ladies, take care of your lady bits... regular physical exams, self breast exams, AND the dreaded pap smear are all a part of good health management. Precaution, prevention, and early detection saves lives.
Go here for some added inspiration. And boob lube.
